...Ah-ha!...

Have you ever had one of those 'ah-ha' moments? Where something clicks in your thoughts, or maybe even in your heart? Where something sinks in, and becomes tangible? 

This morning I had an ah-ha moment.

I was journaling, which I admit I don't do nearly as often as I should, and God spoke to me about the Truth of the petitions and requests that I brought before Him. You see, I have been struggling with a place to belong. I have felt like I have been floating through life lately, and I just wasn't sure why. Some things have gone...well, let's just say that things haven't gone the way I expected them to. Not even the way that they were designed to. Life has sort of been this roller coaster. And I internalize 99% of it. I don't typically share my greatest joys or my deepest fears, my personal victories or my struggles. 

God revealed to my heart that the #1 problem in my life is:

...are you ready?...

WORRY.

Boom! There is that ah-ha, like a cold splash of water on my face.

These are God's words to me:

"You worry about things that you cannot control. Does worry benefit your life? No! Worry is death to faith." He goes on to say, "...you choose not to trust Me. You choose to worry."

Ouch! It's like I can hear the Almighty God telling me that I am killing my own faith.

That is scary!!!

He says something that really hit me hard, though, which gives me hope. He said that I choose to worry. It is by my own choice that my faith is either built, or dies. God does not give faith, God has given us the freedom to choose faith. God gives us opportunities to build our faith, but the choice is ours, to stand and press in to Him, or to run away and die without Him.

I am struggling because I have chosen to let my mantle of faith droop.

NO MORE.

Today, I choose to believe God at His Word. 

Today, I choose to recognize that my every need is met, and that a Sovereign God Who loves me, is Faithful to provide for me.

Today, I choose Jesus.

My prayer for you is that you discover authentic faith for yourself. That you cultivate a relationship with God, and that you recognize His voice as it stirs inside you. Let Him refine you, even if it hurts. The Truth is often not the easiest thing to understand or follow. But it is the Truth nonetheless. God is Truth and Love and Faithful. He will never leave of forsake you. He will not let you stay down in that pit, unless you choose not to let Him help you up.